Misunderstandings: The Most Amazing Thing

  I have experienced the most amazing thing:  a complete misunderstanding.  Actually, many, many misunderstandings.  It’s amazing how misunderstandings happen and how often they happen.  Let me give you an example:  I wanted something from my husband and let him know (I’ll spare you the details…just assume I’m right).  My husband responded with what I would describe as a retort and his response…

Trauma and Stabilization

Having a history of trauma leads to some predictable difficulties in life.  This handout is to help you understand some of what’s needed to be able to move forward. Stabilizing Because of the nature of post-traumatic stress, you may find yourself feeling out of control, acting compulsively, and being overrun with unwanted thoughts.  The first step of…

Trauma & Emotions

Having a history of trauma leads to some predictable difficulties in life.  This post is to help you understand some of the difficult emotions you may be experiencing. There are certain emotions you experienced during your traumatic experience(s) that were incredibly intense and confusing.  As a result, many trauma survivors try to avoid feeling emotion as much…

Trauma and Beliefs

Having a history of trauma leads to some predictable difficulties in life.  This post is to help you understand some of the thought processes you may be experiencing and give some tips on how to move forward. Thoughts and Beliefs All humans make sense of their experience.  Sometimes we know that we are doing it, but sometimes…

Abusing the Term “Abuse”

One benefit of being in the mental health field for a couple of decades is the ability to step back and notice large-scale changes over time. One change that stands out is a tremendous increase in the use of the word abuse or abusive.  Historically, the term abusewas reserved for the most grievous actions against a person’s dignity – sexual abuse…

Feeling Hard Stuff

Avoiding Reality One of the reasons I’m not a proponent of marijuana legalization is that folks who use it regularly don’t develop skills to handle difficult emotions. For example, when a teen experiences rejection, or disappointment, or sadness, or anxiety and regularly uses pot to soften those emotions, he or she doesn’t learn what to…

Good and Easy?

The Hardest Peace I’m reading this book called “The Hardest Peace” and it’s not a happy ending, I can tell already. My biggest clue is that my friend told me not to read the ending in public, and that she cried deep sobs as she read it. (I’m really intuitive and can read between the…